Can I have the A-1 sauce and a side of mother love, please? I give the client whatever they want to set the mood, which is why I sometimes have found myself describing settings where, in fact, I've never been: a dimly...
View MoreThe lows make his highs seem even higher. I gave him his nickname only recently: "Rollercoaster Man", so called because his moods can switch from call to call, and because I am trying to expunge ableist language from my vocabulary and "bipolar"...
View MoreNo jokes about limp noodles, please. This caller of mine is moderately infamous by now, simply because his call from six winters ago is the one I dredge up whenever someone asks me, "What's the weirdest call you've ever done?" They're expecting...
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This is gonna take a bit of cleanup, a-yup...
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Definitely going to have to fill in some blanks before you visualize a titty-fuck up in there...
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I have a lot more to work with than Severus Snape, too. I'm always surprised when clients seem to worry about what I think of them and their Thing. I don't mean when they are obviously prodding me to judge them, and...
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Less broodiness, more bopping each other over the head with pillows! I have only began talking to this caller this year, and although he did become something of a regular in the few months before I went off to tour the UK,...
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I always suck the bones CLEAN. (And chew the ends. What? I'm talking about short ribs here.) Ever since the second year of my employment in phone sex, I've always toured, for at least six months out of the year. It wasn't...
View MorePigs actually roll around in mud, not shit, and it's just to stay cool. I think I might be maligning pigs too much...
View MoreI hate myself for wanting this, and I hate you for giving it to me. It started out a normal, nothing-special, 10-minute call. He wanted an older girl with big tits. That would be me. I found his card, and scanned it...
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